Haven’t parents suffered enough, Honda? Must you be a proponent of one of the most diabolical forces facing parents today? The insufferable outrage we speak of is the indescribably popular “High School Musical” movies.
If you have been living under a rock or don’t have any kids under 13, let us get you up to speed. “High School Musical” follows the lives of a bunch of hormonal and incredibly acne-free teenagers. As these films come from the great minds in Hollywood all of these “teenagers” are actually actors nearer 35 and are doing this gig to pay for their mortgage. But we digress.
Instead of the usual morose brooding and internal suffering most of us go through during our high school years, these youngsters break into song during football practice or even when going from class to class. Didn’t you do that, too? The gritty realism of teen-angst dramas of yore like “My So Called Life” and “Party of Five” are nowhere to be found. In this reality, no one’s family all dies in a car accident and Jennifer Love Hewitt’s breasts don’t grow 15 inches over the course of one episode.
“High School Musical 3”, in linking with Honda, got a number of free vehicles for use during production. For fans of the show, apparently Gabriella’s mother drives a Honda Odyssey; Sharpay (is this person a dog?) drives a Pink S2000 (our eyes!), and a Pilot; and Civic Hybrid are driven by various members of the cast. It is unclear who owns them, but who needs a valid registration when you can burst into song when a cop pulls you over?
It is also vital for “High School Musical 3” to get these unique cross promotional tie ins-as the movie is making the odd move of debuting in theatres. Will it be as successful if families have to load up the kids and go into the theatre and watch this garbage themselves? Probably, as it will keep the young ones quiet if only for those precious two hours. Us, we would rather have electric power drills shoved into our ears. Honda ones, of course.
Our view? We love a good musical as much as the next guy when they are quality items like “Chicago” or “Hairspray,” not a modern day “Xanadu.” As for Honda, we wonder what the point is of promoting a film directed pretty much only at the 13 and under set. Maybe because Toyota's even more youthful Scion beat them to the punch? Anyway, for the company's sake, we hope it will inspire goodwill in the tweens' hearts when they turn sixteen and start begging for a new Civic. For those of you with kids, or with an utter lack of taste, the film open October 24th.